Every time you have a freeze in the bathroom, you tell yourself the same thing:
"But why me? What did I do to deserve this? Am I really going to have to live my whole life with this shy bladder?"
Believe me, I know the pain. The situation may seem dire. Despite that, we can still see a glimmer of light down the hall. Here are 3 good news related to paruresis:
1. Paruresis is not a physical problem
The first thing, and not the least, is that paruresis is not a physical or genetic problem.
Dysuria, which is the difficulty in evacuating urine, does exist and can have several physical causes.
However, in the case of shy bladder, this is not the case. You know this instinctively because when you have the necessary privacy you don't have a problem.
Paruresis is considered a social phobia. And like all phobias, the cause(s) are more in our heads.
2. Phobias are curable
This brings us to the 2nd point. Phobias are curable.
Is it always easy? NO.
Is it possible? YES.
When you have experienced paruresis, you know that mundane situations can become a nightmare. It's clearly not something you want to live with your whole life.
Fortunately, we live in an age where there are many solutions to combat phobias. From gradual exposure, to cognitive therapies such as EFT, EMDR or other mindfulness techniques...they are many techniques, but their goal is the same: to interpret the situations that scare us differently, in other words, to desensitize or emotionally detach ourselves from stressful situations.
3. You are responsible for your future
Knowing that it is not a genetic or physical problem and that it is curable, you have all the good news of the day to act.
The problem is that overcoming a phobia can take anywhere from a few minutes to several weeks.
The problem is that we are in a society of immediacy. If it doesn't work quickly, then it doesn't work, and you move on to something else.
It's like going to the gym once or twice, lifting a bit of weight and saying it doesn't work because you don't see results. The truth is that the muscles had already started to grow, but in weight training, like many worthwhile things, it takes persistence to see results. If you follow a serious program, the results are bound to come.
If you want to overcome your paruresis, your 3 keywords will be :
- Perseverance
- Regularity
- Courage
The fact is that your paruresis lives with you today. If you don't go to war against it by making the strong choice to defeat it, let me tell you that it will follow you for the rest of your life.
So, what to do?
"Hi, in this video I'm gonna give you three good reasons why your paruresis is not set in stone and why it's a good news.
The first point I wanted to address is that paruresis also known as shy bladder is not a physical problem. It's not something on which you can do nothing actually, it's a phobia so it's a good news to know that it's not related to your genes, it's not related to something within your body where you can do nothing about it, it's something it's an irrational fear and that's a good news. So it's also true that there is some problem urinary problem related to physical problems such as dysuria which involves physical problem. But in the case of paruresis this is that is not the case because as you know if you have shy bladder, if the intimacy condition are met such as you are in a cubicle for example or there is no one around you will manage to pee without any problem. It's just a block that is created when there is an external factor that is blocking us, basically. Therefore point number one: this is not a physical problem!
The second point is that like I said before paralysis is a phobia actually it's categorized as a social phobia and this is a good news also because we live in a time when we have a lot of solutions to overcome our phobias such as, for example: hypnosis, EFT, EMDR, or other kind of CBT therapies. There are plenty of them and this is very very good news to know that there is hope, there is solutions out there and that it's possible to actually overcome the shy bladder. So for some people with paruresis or shy bladder most of the time we feel we are alone in the world to have this thing, that I know very well that, and this is not true this is something that where there is solution because it's a phobia and like any phobia it's an irrational fear that we can overcome. So point number two: paruresis is a phobia and we can overcome it!
The third point is that YOU are responsible for your future now knowing that it's not a physical problem, it's a phobia that is curable, it means that now you have all the cards in your hand to take action and do something about it try to find solution, try to act on it and and make progress towards being released from the paruresis basically. Because when we know the pain it is every day, because we need to pee every day that's the problem, when we know the pain it is to not being able to be in public places or not to be able to enjoy concerts or big events, outside events or to take long flights or long trains whatever . Truly it's something that is really really worth the effort to work towards and yeah, so the third point, the third good news is that you are responsible for your own good basically and you can overcome it if you want to. To conclude this video what I wanted to say is that there is hope there is light at the end of the tunnel and if you want to overcome your paruresis yes it is possible and so if today you are someone who is fed up with shy bladder syndrome and fed up of freezing in the toilets, and fed up of not being able to go to some places whatever It's possible and so if you want to start your journey on overcoming paruresis you will find some links under the video where you will find resources so you can start your process towards overcoming paruresis. I'll see you in another video and take care."